can you have both asperger's and narcissism

Im a laid back person & im used to him not talking to me & wanting his own space to do his own thing & not socialising , but sometimes he gets me so stressed I end up with a bad headache & feel sick. I feel sorry for people reading this trying to get help for their narcissism. Good luck to all of you struggling to understand your own difficulties. 2. LadyJay you have found what I have found. There is a site called First Wives World that may be of help as well. Its hard i have to act and look strong and narc to protect myself while trying to be good and do good around me undercover? 5. Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment below. So I have a confusing situation, please bare with me. The flashback was in real time, I felt intolerable pain, and also the emotion of terror. 9. He was talking one day about his job and pedophiles came up and I mentioned Id been molested as a child. I cant change the world so i try to take what i can and leave the rest but its complicated. It goes against that 1-dimensional description. A few times he said I was a good person. Some autistic people can lack empathy (but only through not understanding a situation entirely once you explain what is going on they will show huge sympathy and understanding for the situation). I did this to get my head around my ex (who was a psychopath) and asked myself, would I walk past him in the street, and the answer was yes. Sorry for carrying on but he has traits on both sides of that list and I dont know what to do. I dont hate others or have any kind of problem or jealousy. Our grandson has a milder case but enough where you can tell he is in his own wonderful world. Broken mirrors: A theory of autism. Im not being cheap, but of course he refuses to understand all the other things that need spending money on. I developped a 6th sense for dealing with narcs. So when looking at the so called normal people, how many different traits are there? I have High Functioning Autism and I also have antisocial tendencies I must always keep properly managed. Hi Jenny, I will note these books, one of which he was recommended by his therapist.The Body Keeps The Score. And it was clear, looking back, his autism was in fact a bit to blame. Speaking from my own experience there is nothing I want more than to meet the needs of a partner and join with them spiritually. Courage my friends.xx. But what Im getting here is we should be more understanding and more patient in dealing with aspie partners because their shortcomings actually point to a developmental disorder. 8. It was a bit of a shock to my system but I do feel Ive grown from these experiences. If this fellow you have been seeing does have Aspergers as you mentioned he watches the same movie over and over, you will need to learn as much as you can about the condition to be able to understand how to handle someone with it. Narcissists will try to reel you in by saying nice things, and if you let your guard down, they have you again. They pushed me and then sometimes helped or suggested me student loan or something like that, that they would sign for me etc. I was born into what seems to me to be a family of narcs and was terribly bullied, abused and scapegoated both as a child and as an adult in the end I had to cut contact with my whole family. If someone is doing something stupid, you cannot jump inside their brain to stop them, they need to use their brain to stop themselves, the responsibility is not yours.) The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. . I care about him and dont like pointing these things out to him as he says I look to make big deals out of nothing, they go on the list so now Im beginning to wonder about myself. A COMPLEX TRAUMA TEAM was set up and this turned out to be a life changer where therapy is concerned. The Blind Guy starts is ridiculed because no one has experienced the Statue like him, some of the seeing may experience some of the things, but dont understand the blind man not knowing what blue was and what it depicted, the blind man man has a lot more information about the statue, but has no way of describing it the way most people see it. Other autistics actually have an excess of empathy- a bit like the HSP (I wonder if all HSPs are actually autistic but that I dont know). Its the only way, hes toxic and it wont ever get any better. This means being around people she doesnt know causes her anxiety she cant control, so to counteract this she retreats back into her safe place. Narcissistic rage is an outburst of intense anger or silence that can happen to someone with narcissistic personality disorder. I know that this is the wrong thing to do but it is a powerful thing that certain people have over me, and try as I might, it is a habit that I have yet to be successful breaking. Perhaps if you did some research yourself on narcissism and manipulation you may get a better sense of whether this is happening to you or not. Thankyou Robin, Im Pleased it was helpful. 6. I dont believe she will ever change, but if there is a chance I would be willing to slowly, but very slowly let her back in. I am an advocate for marriage, I believe in it and I greived greatly when my marriage ended. I am aware there is no known info whether or not it is hereditary but always wondered because of others in our family with it. My main problem is that I still keep forgetting that I cannot treat him as a normal person, so I make problems for myself. Narcissism is a personality condition that ranges from mild to severe. They are capable of approaching you. The car, the TV, feminism, the internet, and now, unashamedly the smart phone you can go back and say the mirror of course. (2005, April 18). Thank you. My family.. hates me with a.. mortal passion. Asperger's (AS) and High Functioning Autism (HFA) are often confused with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Yes, they are as varied in character as other folk. They may try to keep their demons at bay until the demons pounce on them and take them over. 8. I know that for sure. Im in a 30 year relationship with an empathic woman who is just wonderful. I still get caught out from time to time but not often. I keep reading that we dont recover but I i imagine there has to be something that works, both for me and people that encounter me. Your life so far sound very much like you have been at the mercy of a number of narcissist. This works out well because Narcissistic people dont take responibilty or blame for any of their own behaviour and having a condition to blame works for both of us. Observe his real behaviour without your emotional attachment. I think my brother and sister, both younger than me, were abused too but they dont remember anything, and they dont believe what my story. But the relationship was then, and hard, and without that relationship I mentioned, with the Aspergers/Narcissicistic person, I would not have had my second breakdown in 2015, which was more severe than the first, and took much longer to recover from. In case anyone is concerned that I lashed out in a physical or highly abusive way to this woman, that is not the case. How did you come to this conclusion? Time has passed since I wrote those comments and I can say the journey to recover from the relationship with that afflicted person has been very difficult. I did VERY well considering my start in life. Its a complicated subject matter and can cause great distress. Oberman, K., & Ramachandan, V. (2007, June 1). Its like a surgeon in a surgery room see a person bleeding to death and hes like well hope you will clean up the mess when you get better cauz i wont and leave I mean.. its insane They have 0 logic.. 0 brain. He contacted me about having a coffee however I made him wait for a couple of months, i just wasnt ready. One 12 years and the other 6. Both ADHD and NPD can impact the way you see yourself, others, and . So i have the autistic ways but i also have narcs traits. I do not accept any kind of social heirarchies to me everyone is just a human being. Break up and never look back. There was a wait to get in but in the end it has been well worth it. I really feel for the people there, they are getting many conflicting messages. This is not something any of my family have had to encounter before and I really struggle with it. He can be as sweet as pie and can be mean and cruel I suspected autisim (his nephew has a more than moderate case living with supervision in a home). What I do need to add to this is even more obvious that say, dont put Hg and Al into people My marriage ended after 38 years and I was a wreck, but with self help I feel I have bounced back to a new wonderful life. A relationship counsellor would be a good start if you find he is willing to do this. I look back now and the courage it took for me to end it was beyond me and something I have not ever regretted. And then on the flip side again, he definitely sits on the pity pot and blames others. However, hes very one-dimensional and not connected to his feelings. I had to write to the director of the foundation here and expose the entire situation in a group email .. to force them into action. Even with people you once knew well. I could right a book on this subject as lots of people afflicted with these conditions want a decent relationship and to be loved and honoured as most of us do. Bottom line? You have to change yourself, of course with Gods great help and leading. No, but was referred to another phone number. Im super confused for myself right now (and how narcissistic is that right out of the gate!!). Another was made by the psychologist Dr Richard Eisenmajer called Imagine Having Aspergers Syndrome, A first consultation. The narcissist harms other people because they are harmed themselves. I have learned people with Aspergers or autism as its now called suffer from a lot of anxiety. My life is ruined, i live in a foundation for autistic adults that had.. my life. To Maureen, no chance this allows comments these days or that you can check this but in case it works and anyone reads I didnt realize that but it makes sense. I suffered so much, went down in alcoolism, drugs, compulsive gambling. Is this just normal for your country? How could i know i was that good, or had any kind of skills or whatever my entire family and world kept destroying me all my life. And yes if you can get away from the blackhole like spirit of these people you are unwittingly facilitating. My reaction scared me and I finally left him for my own sanity. Hehe. I try to be as humble and honest as i can but in our world the narcs are everywhere and they abuse it everytime they can so i had to change. Lol but heh who knows. He developed Alzheimers at 58yrs old and lost his words, the best way to describe it. Yes one doesnt have to go overboard with putting themselves first, but they dont have to give in to the whims of what others want to feel happy. Childhood traumas need to be dealt with promptly but when these traumas are not understood they show up in the most peculiar ways. When its a guy like me that has to enlighten the whole god dam healthcare dep of my region on how its insane to let a autistic guy like me in a foundation cauz i cant live on my own or take care of me fully.. let the guy starve to death! It is not 100% of course but the symptoms you describe are also expected with both low testosterone and therefore can start even before 40, but also due to head injury or events replicating the inflammation of head injury, e.g. Narcissistic traits can emerge in adolescence but NPD is a personality disorder that isn't typically diagnosed before age 18. underneath them. again, im not an animal that needs to be trained. It was amusing when I read your sentence think of all the mean things hes done to you, not the good things. and my immediate thought was, what good things? When trying to leave a narcissist it is hard and they will keep pulling you in if you let them. People are not.. really smart in general, sorry for straight talking. As I said previously I have a daughter (unmarried) who has high functioning autism, I have another daughter who doesnt have autism, but has two children with it. We used to go out every Saturday, but now he pulls a face if I wanted to go somewhere, so we dont. Do not be satisfied with the status quo; instead, get in there and help your loved one learn how to relate to you in a healthy way. HELL YA! No DIY, repairs, painting or buy things for the house, I feel like he doesnt deserve it! The treatment then was medication and psychiatric ward. A few months later there was a second flashback. I watched a DVD recently by a psychologist called Dr Richard Eisenmeyer. Time and time again. Yet they can really convince people they are the nicest, caring, FUN people you would want to spend time with. People living on devices, with bluelight burning their retina and corneas. And it starts all over, the hurt, the misery, the messing with your brain and all the other stuff that goes on. For many of us that is something we can only dream of. 3. If they do this, then they are Narcissistic, if they dont then it is Asbergers. It all depends on the person and those are on the autism spectrum are difficult to understand. I have a 32 year old daughter who still lives with me and has high functioning autism, her personality is nothing like his was. And from that point you are going down the superficial hill that most people go down when they do not have the skill, experience or knowledge of autism. Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Asperger's Disorder. I could easily be wrong about what I said. Maybe thats just evidence that some things can be more than one thing, and that someone can be a bit Aspergers AND a bit narcissistic. I do care about him because I think he has a problem and maybe cant help himself but its getting tiresome. Following are some suggestions for coping with this type of relationship: Copyright 2017 GoodTherapy.org. Asperger's does not exist in a bubble that protects it from co-morbid disabilities and mental defects. Consequently I had a melt down myself and put space between us. This happened at a hospital school in the late 1950s where he was sent away to for six months. Best wishes to you. Thank you James, I appreciated reading about your rather unpleasant experiences, but feel uplifted by your courage, determination and perseverance to get yourself into good and positive emotional and mental awareness . Theres likely been more erronously diagnoses in history. My family is entirely narcissistics. I can prove all my allegations, its the sad truth that more than just me live. I did some research in order to give justice to this topic. I dont have aspergers but my daughter does. Break up and never look back. But my fear is that the relief is temporary.. i wont be relieved for 40 years What will happen to me when that moves on.. the emptiness of my life, the whole thing.. is pretty dam bad.

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